When Christians Marry Muslims

from Shane's Muslim Connect

How would you feel if your child, born or not yet, grew up and married a Muslim? My friend Jami Staples wrestles with this as she counsels Christians who have married Muslims and parents whose kids have or are considering it. 

Here’s an excerpt from our recent conversation. You can read the full transcript here. Jami also highly recommends the article, “Considerations for Marrying a Muslim."

Why has this become such a compelling issue for you, Jami?

. . .it exposes two profound realities: Women are not convinced of the identity given to them by a very good and loving God, and they’re not at all convinced their Muslim friends need to know Jesus.

What do you tell someone when they ask, “Where is God in the midst of my daughter marrying a Muslim?”

Interestingly I don’t get that question a lot. Most parents. . . tend to punish themselves before they punish God. [They] say, “I wish we’d talked more directly about how to choose her spouse” or “what did we do wrong?” We need to remember she is making choices based on much more than what she’s been taught. She is making decisions on who she believes herself to be.

What unique motivations lead Christian women to marry Muslim men?

Well, that is the million dollar question, isn’t it? Despite what the modern feminist movement wants us to believe, women prefer to be cherished. Many Muslim men are raised in cultures which value beauty, language, and hospitality. . . . Second, Muslims are not only permitted but encouraged to marry “women of the Book” (Christians and Jews). Finally, the discussions she is having with her Muslim friend about faith. . . quickly degrade to opinions rather than truths. When “love is all that matters” becomes the bottom floor, there’s no stairwell for truth.

What do you tell someone who’s already married to a Muslim?

. . . God is a God who sees you. He knows the desires of your heart, your good intentions, and the circumstances you are in. He’s never left you. Meanwhile, pray for your husband. God is in his story too.

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